Cailou and Crashbox

both girls are addicted to Cailou, which really bothers me. cause i HATE the lil fecker. he is SOOOOO whiney, and annoying. but at least he doesnt try to maim his lil sister like Addy does, so that kind of encourages her to be nicer to Niamh.
Addy is loving Crashbox, from HBO. its an educational show, but its really funny, and cool, and she really enjoys learning new things :)
right now she is learning about Richard Nixon :P

Morgan has gotten back into his artwork, which makes me really happy. he is so talented, and its nice to see him enjoy using his talents again. instead of sitting infront of a video game. in fact he hasnt played a video game in over a month. :D its helped our relationship alot. thank goodness. i feel more connected to him when he isnt playing WoW.

Addy helped make pizza from scratch last night, she really enjoys cooking. and a few days ago we made some banana bread. its nice to cook with her. we all enjoy the results, and she gets such a good feeling inside knowing she made something. :)

Niamh is talking up a storm now, repeating everything, following 2+ step directions, and even putting 2 and someties 3 words together. i love watching language develop in kids, its so wonderful to see their world expand and everything start to make sense to them :)

as for me, i got on Zoloft, and its helped. alot.
i got a diagnosis of Fibromyalgia, which explains all of my constant pain, the tummy issues, the sleep issues, the brain fog, everything. i applied for disability, if i cant work because of this, and i cant bring income to my family because of my pain, and other fibro issues, then i need to be able to help provide for them somehow.
my Dr has recommended taking a ton of vicodin to help manage the pain, and to get my ommp card asap, which will have to wait til tax return $ comes in. and that should help me manage my pain as well.

the weather is slowly warming up, all the snow is long melted, and the ground is soggy, thanks to all of our gorgeous oregon rain. i cant wait for the spring flowers to start popping up :)

update

so, i started taking Zoloft in October.
i feel better.
i do
i feel good.
i no longer want to jump off the overpass, or hide under the blankets all day long.
things still get me down, and i still get sad, but its no longer a deep dark downward spiral of depression. i dont feel like a zombie at all surprisingly. i am still having all my own feelings. i am just not depressed.
it feels really really good.
thank the stars for Zoloft :)